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Female Translation
I’d rather this guy think I’m a dirty trick than sleep with him.
What to do
Depends on the STD. Wear a condom. Always.
Sometimes the girl is genuine and she is an honest person. I had a friend who went to bed with a girl who admitted she had Herpes after she undressed. He ran out and never saw her again.
Dave Chappelle on avoiding STDs
Female Translation
One of my relatives is having issues. I can’t think about you right now.
What to do
So, this happened to me once when a girl canceled on a date. She did not give me the specifics, except a text “I have a family emergency”. Further texts from me asking for details, getting no reply, then setting up another date failed.
Sometimes this excuse is valid, though. Most of the time, it is not. Be aware of specifics in this excuse. “Family” could mean anything from mom to second cousin in my dad’s family tree.
Image Source: Awkward Family Pictures
Dimitri the Lover, the infamous phone message guy is up to no good again with a film of his own:
Dimitri the Lover:
Female Translation
Help! Stalker!
What to do
Run. Fast.
