Female Translation

You’re SUCH a good friend. I love having you around. BUT, I am not interested in you sexually. I hope I can keep you around while I sleep with other more sexually attractive guys. You’re like my female friends without the PMS and catfights! How cute!

What to do

Volumes have been written on getting out of the “friend zone“. The friend zone is a dark and unhappy place. The best way to get over this excuse is to maintain the friendship and start dating other girls. Start a jealousy plot line. Woman (and people in general) value that which they cannot easily obtain.

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Female Translation

I am concerned about my lifestyle!  I just want to get rid of this guy who’s been stalking me for the past 6 months. Oh, I’ll just say something serious related to my ‘career’ goals and he’ll shoo away.

What to do

What career?!? She’s still in school! This usually means that she’s evaluating her own social value and if she can indeed snatch a better guy with a little work on herself. This of course means you need to be out of the equation and thus this existence of this excuse. Get a lucrative job yourself so she doesn’t have to.

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Female Translation

I love all the attention I get all the time. From the guys. AND girls. Of course the sex is…amazing. I’m at my physical peak right now! Sure eventually I’ll settle down, hopefully with a rich and good looking guy. We can still hangout. Maybe. (When I have absolutely nothing to do).

What to do

Be happy with being single yourself. The best way to get a girl to commit to you is to genuinely have other options.

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Female Translation

It’s not ME, it’s YOU. But I am trying to make you feel better about yourself. So I’m going to say it is totally my fault. Gee…I’m such a nice and caring person. And I am really modest too.

What to do

First, try to find out what it is about you that is making her break up the relationship and if it is fixable. Then, find other girls to date in the meantime and as she sees you with other girls her “defect” might suddently be fixed and she’ll become compatible with you again.

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